On Saturday, I dropped by my bank to make a deposit while Dan waited with Mio in the car. I got a little irritated at the incompetent teller, who told me my card was cancelled and had me wait at customer service for fifteen minutes, only to find that my card had not been cancelled after all and that it was perfectly fine. Needless to say, I was irked that she had wasted my time. (Fifteen minutes is valuable when you are a new parent going on only four hours of sleep!)
The teller then proceeded to tell me:
“Don’t get upset. It’s bad for your baby.”
At this point, I was fuming and wanted to retort “I already had the baby, you presumptuous dimwit,” but I held my tongue and silently stomped out of the bank. Once back in the car, I burst into tears and told Dan that we needed to start stomach crunch bootcamp for me ASAP.
But seriously… who says that?
April 18, 2011 @ 4:40 pm
A stupid person is bad for your mental health. That’s for sure.
April 18, 2011 @ 5:00 pm
I tried not to let it get to me, but I just couldn’t get over how rude she was! UGH.
April 18, 2011 @ 5:45 pm
Make a complaint to the branch manager about the rude teller.. I would!
April 18, 2011 @ 9:46 pm
I thought about that too… but I don’t remember her name, and I don’t feel like wasting any more time on her.
April 18, 2011 @ 4:48 pm
wow…..she’s got some balls to say that!! what if you had just had a chubby belly from a big lunch, instead of it being a result of pregnancy?? so RUDE!
April 18, 2011 @ 5:00 pm
I know! Sure, my tummy is still sticking out a little after having the baby, but it’s more like a 4- or 5-month belly now than a full-fledged 9-month belly. It could have easily been flabbiness unrelated to pregnancy… which would have been even more awkward!
April 18, 2011 @ 5:15 pm
She’s a bitch and you are beautiful. <3 Screw her! People are brainless sometimes.
April 18, 2011 @ 9:33 pm
Thanks Virginia! It just seemed very rude of her to just make an assumption and voice it like that, especially when she’s supposed to be professional. But I will move on and try to forget about it….
April 18, 2011 @ 5:24 pm
Yes, so obnoxious. Try to see the absurdity in it, though; if only the teller knew that your baby wasn’t witnessing your upset because she was waiting in your CAR (!), she would have felt pretty ridiculous. That said, if anything like this happens again (hopefully it doesn’t), I say that you politely inform the offender that the baby has been born! There’s no shame in having a healing, shrinking, post-baby belly, and sometimes all it takes is one embarrassing faux pas to teach someone to not be as boldly presumptuous and judge-y. In any event, I admire your grace under fire, because I probably would not have taken the high road like you!
And, finally, belly crunch bootcamp is all fine and good, but make sure the gap in your abs has healed first! There are tips online re: how to tell if you’re ready for crunches. I just don’t want you to overdo it because of one nosy lady :-p
April 18, 2011 @ 9:38 pm
You’re right, I should have told her that I did already have the baby… I guess I was just kind of shocked and at the same time embarrassed that I still look kind of pregnant. 🙁 But you’re right that it’s perfectly normal for it to take a while for the bump to shrink and that there’s no shame in that. It’s all part of the postpartum recovery.
Don’t worry – I haven’t done a single stomach crunch in actuality… haha* That was just my emotions talking. I am not really ready to start any sort of physical bootcamp for a few more weeks! (And you’re right, I probably shouldn’t until my abdomen has more fully recovered from the pregnancy and delivery.)
Thanks for cheering me up, Tarrin! 🙂
April 18, 2011 @ 11:31 pm
Ha, odds are good that I would have frozen in the moment, too. I am always a victim of this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/L'esprit_de_l'escalier … case in point, the road rage incident on engagement photo day! I just sat there like a deer in headlights, and then obsessed about witty comebacks for days afterward!
April 19, 2011 @ 1:28 pm
haha* I often suffer from that too! I didn’t know there was an actual term for it until now. Why are we prone to run-ins with such mean, rude people? 🙁
April 18, 2011 @ 5:24 pm
Omg what an idiot!!!! I’m sorry you had to go through that. 🙁 I’m so proud of you though Misono I’m sure you’re doing a great job w everything <3
April 18, 2011 @ 9:39 pm
Thank you Miyoung! I just couldn’t believe she said that. At first, I thought, “How dare she?!” but I guess I do sort of still look pregnant so in a way I can’t really blame her for assuming that. But still, to voice it is pretty rude!
April 18, 2011 @ 5:36 pm
wow some people have the nerve 🙁 bank tellers are supposed to be bitter because they are stuck at a job that they don’t like.
April 18, 2011 @ 9:34 pm
Yea, I couldn’t believe she’d have the audacity to say that, even if she was thinking it! 🙁
April 18, 2011 @ 6:13 pm
If you were married to Brandr, he would’ve totally punched that bank teller on your behalf. Consider it done…in a parallel universe. You’re beautiful Sono!!!
April 18, 2011 @ 9:40 pm
Aww, Brandr is a great husband! 🙂 When I told Dan about what happened, he was kind of stunned but couldn’t help but laugh a little. I kind of wish he’d gone back in and gave her a piece of his mind, like Brandr would have!
April 18, 2011 @ 7:18 pm
Sorry to hear that. The teller did have some [rude] balls for sure. You have every right to be mad but don’t let it get to you too much; that wouldn’t be your victory in the end. People like that need to quit their jobs b/c that line of work calls for exemplary customer service.
Anyway, you also have to remember that YOU JUST HAD A BABY and your hormones are going to subject you to some extra emotions. Make sure you’re taking it easy as you take this time to care for Mio and your own body. I totally understand cabin fever but it’s only been two weeks so.. gentle steps. That said, the breastfeeding will help you lose weight but I personally think you should talk to your OB first before you start any abdominal exercises. It takes at least 6 weeks for that region to heal so, just my two cents.
Ack, sorry, maybe I’m giving unsolicited advice here but we all know it’s rough in those early days when sleep is limited. Just concerned for you. Nap when Mio naps so you can feel more refreshed. Ok, take care.
April 18, 2011 @ 9:45 pm
Thank you Hyo! Looking at the situation objectively, I supposed that if I saw a woman with a pregnant-looking belly, I would most likely assume she’s pregnant instead of being in postpartum recovery… so in a way, I don’t blame her for thinking that, but to straight out voice it to the customer seemed out of line. You’re right, I shouldn’t let it get to me too much!
I am feeling pretty emotional lately, and I was really sad to see my mom go back on Friday and have been feeling more homesick than usual. My hormones and moods are off kilter for sure! I am hoping the breastfeeding will help loose the belly fat, like you said — it’s already shrunken down pretty well since delivery, so it’s reassuring. 🙂
And don’t worry — I won’t start on those crunches just yet! I just declared that in my moment of anger and frustration, but my body definitely doesn’t feel ready for them yet. Thank you for your concern. 🙂 It helps to have a sister-in-law who knows a bit about postpartum!
April 18, 2011 @ 7:36 pm
i woulda punched her….or wanted to! haha
April 18, 2011 @ 9:32 pm
haha* My jaw kind of dropped when I first heard the comment. I couldn’t believe how rude she was!
April 18, 2011 @ 7:56 pm
i’m sorry misono. i completely understand. those 3 hours between feedings are important and valuable. hang in there. it will get better (even though it feels like she will never let you sleep). if you need someone to talk or destress with then lmk and i’ll give you my number aldkfalflkdjato call. also
April 18, 2011 @ 7:57 pm
sorry…about the last part. also, check out our local hospital new mom support groups. they are awesome and wish i would have gone sooner! you can come with me to good sam on wednesdays!
April 18, 2011 @ 9:34 pm
Thank you for your kind words, Susie! I was just starting to get a little used to life with a newborn and becoming a little more confident that I’d be able to handle things… and then that rude comment just kind of brought me down. 🙁 I definitely want to look into some new mom groups when things get a little more settled. 🙂
April 18, 2011 @ 8:06 pm
she’s just an asshole. She was probably feeling stupid because she made a mistake which didn’t make you happy, thus took it out on you in some warped, patronizing way. Like, she was mad that you were annoyed with her thus said something bitchy and condescending to make you feel bad for getting annoyed at her mistake.
April 18, 2011 @ 8:08 pm
point being…it wasn’t about your weight but some passive aggressive manipulative way to make you feel bad for getting mad at her.
April 18, 2011 @ 9:34 pm
I know, I just felt like that comment came out of nowhere (it really had nothing to do with the whole fiasco with the card), when she could have just apologized for her mistake. Even if I was still pregnant, that comment still would have been out of line!
April 18, 2011 @ 8:48 pm
Wow, what a tard. Pay her no attention, Misono! You’re a beautiful mommy! 🙂
April 18, 2011 @ 9:34 pm
Thanks Esther… She was quite the jerkface. 🙁 But I’m just going to move on and try to forget about it. If I see her again at the bank, though, she’s getting the evil eye! 😛
April 18, 2011 @ 8:55 pm
that’s so rude!!
April 18, 2011 @ 9:34 pm
Isn’t it? I was kind of flabbergasted that she actually said that! 🙁
April 19, 2011 @ 3:40 am
Ugh! How irritating! Don’t worry, it’s only been a few weeks, you’ll lose the baby weight!
April 19, 2011 @ 1:27 pm
Thanks Pat! 🙂 I’ve heard “9 months in, 9 months out” but hopefully it won’t take 9 months to get back to pre-pregnancy self… lol.
April 19, 2011 @ 6:26 am
What a bitch! Report her ass!
April 19, 2011 @ 1:30 pm
haha* In hindsight, I kind of wish I had…
April 20, 2011 @ 5:37 am
that is a terrible thing to say to anyone whether or not they are pregnant. i would have told her off. *hug*
April 21, 2011 @ 11:32 am
That’s what I thought! Even if I was still pregnant, it’s not really her business to say something like that – the comment was uncalled for in a professional customer service setting! 🙁