When Mio and I were back in Virginia last month, my mother gave us a dress that her friend from Japan had sent for Mio. It’s very over-the-top and super girly (yes, even to me!), and we honestly never have an occasion for Mio to wear it because it’s just so big and fancy. There’s so much tulle on the skirt that it seems like it would get uncomfortable right away, especially for a baby. Still, it’s a beautiful dress and I’d hate for it to go unworn, so we decided to put Mio in it the other day before she gets too big for it.
Here is our little ballerina Mio!
Oh well, it will be a while before Mio will be interested in ballerina dresses! I can’t wait until she starts doing her own sweet little pirouettes across the room…. 🙂
My maternity leave comes to an end tomorrow as I go back to work for the first time since giving birth to Mio. I definitely have mixed feelings. Of course, I can’t help but have some reservations about leaving Mio to go work, after spending virtually every moment of the past three and half months with her. I already know I’ll experience some separation anxiety and constantly wonder how she’s doing while I’m at the office. I feel sad and guilty that I will likely miss some moments in her development and growth. At the same time, though, a part of me is relieved to be going back to work. During the past few weeks, I’ve found myself craving some more human interaction with grown adults, with people who can actual talk when I speak to them. I love Mio and cherish the time I spend with her, but there are definitely moments as a new parent when I feel overwhelmed with stress as well as feelings of exasperation and frustration. Every parent feels suffocated at some point. My cousin once told me that it’s important to have some time away once in a while, since it will make you appreciate your children more and your love for them will grow. I think that for myself personally, having part of my pre-Mio life back will give me balance and a sense of normalcy which will help keep me sane. As rewarding as the experience of motherhood is, I want to continue to pursue my passion that I’ve worked so hard for. I want Mio to grow up to follow her dreams and know that as a woman, you can have both a beautiful family life and the career you dreamed of. What better way to show her than by example? I’m very goal-oriented and feel that I’ll always need to work in some capacity — whether it’s in an office for a company or at home as a freelancer — to feel fulfilled. I don’t consider this selfish, and I think that I’ll function better as a mother for Mio. A happy mommy is a better mommy.
